Puck is lame

Hey guys! I’m posting on Friday this week because I’ll be down at the Boston Comic Con tomorrow with Tony! We’ll have a table set up for Coast City Comics so please come over and say hello if you’ll be around. Now on to something that bothers me…

See this little guy pictured to the right of me? That’s Puck and I could not care less about this character. I am now going to break him down in a way that would make his no doubt tiny, hairy mother cry out worse than when Gretzky went to an American hockey team.

First off he was a member of Alpha Flight. Alpha Flight is a Canadian super hero team. That second sentence is the joke. A Canadian super hero team is on par with arena football in my book. By that I mean they could exist and maybe some people would look at them but if they disappeared you probably would not notice. Arena football went bankrupt and is over by the way.

Second, his name is stupid. I get the reference to Canada’s favorite sport here by calling him Puck, dressing mostly in black and bouncing around a lot. I get the heavy handed comparison to a hockey puck. I don’t know how you could have missed it to be honest. It is like getting a slap shot to the face every time you look at this poor miscreant of nature. I enjoy campy things but this is something like a 5 year old would have came up with in art class. I would like to point out at this point that John Byrne made Puck. Good work John!

I don’t like the giant “P” on his outfit either. It is begging to be made fun of. This super hero is brought to you by the letter P! I can only imagine what any super villain would be thinking when fighting this clown. Here are some words that may come to mind; pee, puny, petit and pint-size. There are other words too but I don’t want to put anything too lewd on here. I mean I did use urine as one and to call anyone urine is pretty mean.

I also went to his wikipedia page in an effort to find something redeeming about this guy but unfortunately there was nothing. He has a pretty convaluted origin that included having an evil sorceror imprisoned inside him which is what made him short. I’m not making that last part up folks! Whoever wrote the article seemed just as confused about the characters history as you will be reading it.

Thankfully Puck was killed by the mutant Michael Pointer who had absorbed all the powers from every mutant who had lost them after House of M. It was a pretty short fight as he was killed in a couple of panels. You’ll see him under Sasquatch on the left. If you’re interested in reading that story we do carry the New Avengers trade where it occurred. It’s a satisfying read if you really don’t like Alpha Flight like me.

Maybe you’re thinking “Hey Action Chad! I love Alpha Flight so why don’t you stop being such a jerk to Puck and tell me how I can get my hands on some back issues!” Good news! I have it on good authority that we have a ton of Alpha Flight back issues. If you’re interested in picking those up then please stop in and ask for them!

Until next time folks!

-Action Chad