Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Namor is a dick!

You would think that a guy that spent as much time hanging around with Captain America as much as Namor has, would probably learn a thing or too about being a decent person. A person that spent the majority of his youth fighting the good fight against the nazis, for the freedom of the world, would have developed a strong moral fiber. If you thought all of that, you would be wrong.

Let me tell you what Namor spends the majority of his time doing. He spends his time swimming around the ocean yelling at fish, whining, and trying to bang your girlfriend. If you need proof of the latter, check out this weeks issue of the Fantastic Four. Namor is still trying to bang Sue Storm. It's been about 30 years Namor, she's not giving it up man. Reed Richards is smarter than you, and can stretch any part of his body out...ANY part. You can't compete with that Namor. Your lucky that Reed hasn't invented a virus specifically designed to kill you, and only you. It's time to move on. Perhaps there are some lovely fish ladies swooning over you....

Oh wait, he did move on. He's been trying to get with Emma Frost in the X-books for the past year and a half. Big surprise, she's not giving it up either. You want to know why? Because she's with Cyclops, leader of the damn X-Men. Namor, and his winged feet, can't compete with that level of awesomeness. Regardless if you managed to get with her for a brief moment in the past. It's the PAST man, get over it. It's cool that Namor tried to hook up with someone of than Sue, but let's try and go for a lady without a man in her life. You're the drunk frat guy hanging out at a trashy bar of the Marvel Universe.

It wouldn't be so bad, if he wasn't an indignant ass to everyone he meets. Always prattling on about how the surface world is full of jerks and how Atlantis is the best ever. You're not endearing yourself to anyone by insulting where they live constantly. You're just acting like a snotty kid that says he has all the cool stuff at his house, in hopes to make everyone think he's awesome. It's not working, get a new shtick or shut up.

If I was Reed Richards and Cyclops, I'd hold this guy down and optic blast his face off. He's the idiotic frat boy of the Marvel Universe. Any guy that has abs like Namor does, and still can't get a girl, is easily a huge ass.Do the math!

"Imperius Rex" means "I'm a giant tool and a dumbass".

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