Wednesday, February 16, 2011

The Street Fighter II Machine


Chickens...why is there always chickens?

When people look around Coast City and The Monster Emporium, they usually notice a lot of the more eccentric items we have in the stores. The pinball machines, movie replicas, old toys, artwork, statues. These are things that I love having in the store, it helps bring people in and get people excited. Why just have a room full of funny books when you can have a room full of funny books and a replica Captain America shield or alien pulse rifle. It just makes sense to be half store, half nerd museum.

These things don't just fall in our lap though. Well, occasionally they do, but we usually have to venture out into the real world and get this stuff. When we received word there was an original Street Fighter II machine in "perfect working condition" and at a good price, we decided to venture up to northern Maine to retrieve it.

It took us longer than we expected to arrive at the place. That's because the state of Maine can just close highway on ramps without mapping out a detour route. Thank goodness we're all early adopters with GPS on our phones. After the runaround, we arrive at a garage that is surrounded by old cars. There are so many cars, that they are blocking all of the entrances into the garage. No one is getting in or out at this point. I have a simple rule about garages. If you have so many vehicles around your garage that need fixing, that you can't get into the garage via a car, then this is not the place to go. Cars should be running and able to drive off of the grounds. They should be fixed. I wasn't into this place.

We ventured up towards the entrance and were greeted with a door that had "smile you're on camera" painted onto it. A man sat behind his desk, only visible due to a purple light on his desk, the rest of the room in darkness. Tristan knocks on the door, and he let's us into the garage. I guess we caught him as he was closing, and didn't know we were coming. I guess someone else was selling his machine and didn't tell him? It seemed dicey to me, but I went in anyways. Keep in mind that I did not smile, despite the fact I was being filmed.

We step into the garage to check out the machine. I would like to say that the arcade machine was the first thing that we noticed, but it wasn't. Instead we were greeted by a set of school lockers next to the machine. Inside the lockers were chickens under heat lamps. Living chickens, clucking away. I turned to my left and noticed that upon entering the garage I didn't notice the giant rooster next to the door. That rooster was not pleased about us being there. That dude was pissed.

The man pulls out the machine. It's covered in dirt, spray paint, dust, and well it looks like some chickens had been hanging out on it as well. I'll let you come to your own conclusion as to what was on the machine. The description only said that it worked though, nothing about the cleanliness of the machine. No foul (no pun intended) as of yet I guess. Let's turn it on to make sure it works.

We turn the machine on. The rooster sees this and makes a long high pitched noise. I start to keep one eye on that rooster. I think he has it in for us. We start to play the game and quickly realize that the majority of the buttons don't work and the first player joystick is busted. Not being able to jump or punch in a fighting game really defeats the purpose of the game's experience. It's not a fight anymore. It's just walking back and forth. We hem and haw for a few minutes, trying to decide if it's worth it to fix the machine. The owner of the machine decides to call a friend of his instead of talking to us. At that point, he doesn't care about the money, and we don't care about the machine anymore.

I carefully walk past the rooster. I still don't trust that guy. We get back to the car and talk about how defeated we feel. Grabbing some Burger King helps soothe some of the sting, but I'll be the first to admit that I really wanted that machine in here. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to build one myself.

It's not easy finding cool stuff for the store. It usually involves us heading out to the middle of nowhere, where chickens rule, and leaving empty handed. I just thought it would be nice to fill you guys in on some of the less talked about exploits that we get into while working at this store. I hope you enjoyed it.

And remember, the next time that you see something cool in the store...we probably had to fight a rooster to get it.

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